Compassion as a Precursor to Wisdom

 

Who wouldn’t want to have more wisdom in their life? I suppose some might hesitate pursuing wisdom if convinced it only came via coping with problems. But is that all there is to wisdom? Every older adult has had challenging life experiences. But only some seem to gain true wisdom. What causes some to have it and others not?

While many factors may be involved, one is well recognized. The practice of compassion is important in the alchemy that is wisdom development.

What is Compassion?

Compassion is a feeling of sympathy or sorrow for another person’s suffering. It is opposite of apathy or indifference. Its makeup includes having concern and respect for someone in pain. 

Many believe we should strive to cultivate the virtue of compassion in ourselves. It motivates us to help others when they are suffering. The more of us helping others, the better off we all may be.

How Can We Cultivate Compassion?

Recent studies have shown that there are many benefits to practicing compassion. For example, people who meditate on compassion have a lower risk of depression and anxiety. They are also less likely to be stressed or experience physical pain. How can we add more compassion in our lives?

We can start by cultivating self-compassion. This is a foundation for better cultivating compassion toward others. It is not about being selfish, but rather about understanding our own contentment. We can start by taking care of ourselves through various activities. These might include taking a break from work, reading a book, eating healthy food or going on a nature walk.

Unlike altruism, compassion is not a selfless act. Self-compassion as a practice leads to some level of wisdom. But even basic self-compassion is learned through experience.

For example, children may complain over going to bed early, although obviously tired. They lack the wisdom of self-care and how rest affects them in the moment as well as the day following. Further, young adults may push themselves to achieve a goal. But with late nights, they may sabotage their progress on subsequent days by wearing themselves down.

Older adults are more likely to embrace the rest they need to sustain themselves for ongoing projects. Through proper rest, they keep their momentum. By practicing self-compassion, through resting as need, they have achieved wisdom about that. 

The practice of compassion toward others helps build relationships that are mutually supportive. For most, compassion toward others starts in the home. Parents show compassion to children. Their children may mirror or mimic it toward them and others. Over time, we learn to express compassion toward others on our own, outside the household.

Practicing Compassion toward Others

In practicing compassion, we seek to help someone who is struggling. This can motivate a compassion recipient to make changes. A person may change their stance in a relationship. For example. perhaps they treat their teachers better, with more understanding. When we help others, we gain insights into what helps others and what does not.

Likewise, if a teacher shows compassion toward us when we are struggling to learn something, we can better respond. Often, teacher and student can find a path to learning that works better together. If a student struggles with software programs, for example, a teacher might relate it to building a bridge with blocks. They can show how one command or block in sequence builds on another. When the teacher shows compassion for learning modules being difficult, the student may learn things in a different way. Both may gain some wisdom during the process.

Learning to practice compassion over simple matters better prepares one to respond to more complex suffering as well. Compassionate practice transfers to more complex problems quite well. Over time, our variety of life experiences and responses provide us with wisdom.

What Does Wisdom Mean?

The word "wisdom" has been used to refer to a variety of things. It can be seen as knowledge, understanding, or insight. Acting with wisdom is also a virtue. We often associate it with the cultivation of knowledge and the pursuit of truth.

Wisdom has been seen as both an intellectual and an emotional state. The intellectual side includes the ability to think about things deeply. The emotional side includes empathy, compassion, and self-control. Here, we recognize compassion as part of wisdom’s inherent makeup.

Although wisdom has been written about for thousands of years, studies of it are much more recent. Vivian Clayton first published empirical research on wisdom in 1976. She found wisdom to be “behavior born of knowledge and instilled with thoughtfulness and compassion” (Karlgaard, p. 122). Here, compassion makes the true difference between standard learning and wisdom.

Other research concurs. Dilip Jeste’s work identifies wisdom components. These are "pragmatic knowledge of life; the ability to regulate emotion; prosocial behavior, which entails compassion, altruism, and empathy: and knowing one’s strengths and limitations” (Karlgaard, p. 125).

While Jeste's makeup is more nuanced than simply compassion and learning, compassion is a key. Again, it is a precursor to wisdom. While a toddler may show compassion to other children, with few life experiences, toddlers aren't wise. But life experiences alone don’t always lead to wise behaviors. Sustained compassion during a lifetime of experiences is the pathway to wisdom.

Wisdom’s Effectiveness depends on Compassion

Wisdom is an important matter that life teaches us. But wisdom only flourishes when coupled with the compassionate understanding of others. So, I am grateful for my compassionate friends and mentors who have helped me get through tough times in life. Hopefully, I’ve been able to help them as well. Without such help, one may have ample learning but lack the wisdom to use it effectively.

Seeking others for wisdom doesn’t have to be arduous. No need to climb a mountain to seek a guru. It can be as simple as calling a friend who has gone through a situation like yours. By doing so, you are seeking their compassionate wisdom.

But seeking wisdom from others isn’t confined to those we know well. In groups online, those new to paganism often post worries over offending the powers that be. Many of us with longer life experiences will then share our wisdom to help allay such fears. Seeing the responses from those struggling clarifies what is helpful and what is not. Such conversations, often repeated, better inform others how to respond next time. A community gains wisdom slowly. Practicing compassion and gaining wisdom supports everyone involved in a mutually supportive framework. 

Outcomes of Wisdom coupled with Compassion

Wisdom is the ability to discern what is true or false, right or wrong, and the knowledge of how to deal with both. Compassion is a feeling of deep sympathy for someone else’s misfortune.

We treat others with understanding and kindness through combined wisdom and compassion. Compassionate people don't want to see anyone suffer and will lend a hand even if not asked. Compassionate wisdom leads us to make better decisions in life. We do so while better understanding other's shortcomings. 

We also better understand our own shortcomings and practice self-compassion. We can stop being hard on ourselves over things we’re unlikely to do well, and focus on other things. Life feels better with compassion. 

Wisdom allows for better decisions. Continuing to practice compassion allows us to develop more wisdom. Practicing compassion becomes more effective with wisdom. Both mutually support a better, effective life.

Karlgaard, Richard. “Late Bloomers.” Publ. by Penguin Random House LLC, Crown Publishing Group. 2019.